#gender gets to be complicated

[rockin-mobbin]

My choir community was having a conversation about how to refer to a trans person in the past tense. Like, especially if you knew them pre-transition, do you refer to them with their new name and pronouns, or their old ones because those were the names and pronouns they used at the time that the story you're telling occurred?

(The answer, if you don't already know: Unless that trans person has specifically told you otherwise, you use the name and pronouns they use now, regardless of the time when the story took place. To do otherwise could potentially out them, and that can be extremely dangerous and put them at risk of losing their job, friends, family, housing, or life. Don't do it, unless told BY THAT PERSON that it's okay, and in which circumstances it's okay.)

Anyway, it got me reflecting on my gender journey. I feel like, I was definitely a little girl, and an adult woman for a time, and that’s still real. I had all of these Feelings about gay boys (and men) that I just...thought were completely unattainable/unrealistic because of the body that I have, so I might as well make the best of it and be a bisexual enby because like, that's still gay within the context of what I've got, so...that's probably fine, that's probably enough.

Yeah, well. Turns out I'm gay for men and gay for women and gay for enbies. I'm just GAY GAY GAY. But I still want the gay boys to see me and like me, and what I have going on physically just kinda...isn't so much what they're into.

I won't be fussed about it if someone refers to past-me as a girl or woman when telling stories about past-me, because I didn't hate that part of me. It was real. I just didn't connect to it as much as I accepted it as practical reality. I tried being Very Intentionally Femme, but the more I think about that, the more I feel like I kinda just wanted a playbook for understanding a way to be queer and sexy in the body I have. For me, there's SO MUCH intersection between fatness and gender that it's hard to untangle what influences what.

[pokeberry5]

girl experiences gender euphoria and is immediately slammed by grief

for @litttlittt <3. this was supposed to be a portrait of caroline hill, but litta mentioned tim looking like janet when dressed as caroline and identity issues and angst and things spiraled

something about tim not knowing if he's his mother's child or bruce's or neither's.

figuring out the looks:

i wanted janet to have that poofy 70s hair

[dreamyintersexouppy]

idk my gender as intersex person is definitely complicated but it's not just a stand in for layers of transness. i think if when i felt like a boy someone called me an MTFTM id punch them in the jaw cuz that's so unbelievably reductive and cruel. i don't need to steal labels from trans people and contort them without respect to their original context just to describe how being intersex affects my identity. in fact i think it would be good if there was actual intersex theory cuz my real issues aren't whose trauma am i co-opting so i can have a pretty word in my bio, my real issue is my chronicly painful periods, how damaged my immune system has gotten because of the surgery i got at birth still affecting me, finding doctors who can even begin to try and help me instead of just shrugging and telling me to suffer, no word stolen from transfeminist theorists can help me with that and no tme intersex person has ever helped me with it either when they're using themselves as a rhetorical prop to utterly erase me from the conversation as an intersex transfem

[shadowuserannie]

I think there should be more funny misunderstandings with Voltra.

Like for a good few centuries, since Voltra was introduced to Gur'latan, it has only ever been held by women, right? Only once a Princess of Gur'latan inherited the Voltra element, would she become the Empress Satriantar of Gur'latan. (correct me if I'm wrong)

So, what if people assume Boboiboy is a woman?

Because for centuries, tales of the Empresses Satriantars of Gur'latan have spread throughout the galaxy. Respected, magnificent, inspiring female warriors. So when Boboiboy of Earth bests Retak'ka, they assume that Boboiboy is a female warrior, too.

Maripos: You're not what I expected.

Boboiboy: What did you expect?

Maripos: Are you actually a woman?

Boboiboy: ...

Boboiboy: what.

[pirateprincessjess]

how many dog ears do you own and how are they all SO cute? also are they associated with any specific like. characters or personas? like do you have a bunch of dog ocs? or are they just for cuteness? either way i love your collection 😻

I have 4 pairs of dog ears! The green and black one are my favorites!

They aren’t really for OCs or Personas (though I do have some puppy OCs). I just find them to be gender affirming.

At the end of the day, I am a woman. But if you want to be more nuanced, my gender is woman in a puppy kind of way. A puppy girl!

I’m not saying that I identify as a dog, because I don’t. I’m a human woman whose gender happens to be a little bit puppy.

I’ve been posting puppy stuff on main lately because I’ve been more comfortable presenting this way lately. I feel cute, and I feel good about myself, and I’m excited to share that self love.

[uncanny-tranny]

I love trans people whose transness means that their sexuality is complex. I love trans people who adopt contradictory labels. I love transmasculine people who still have ties to old lesbian spaces and transfeminine people who still have ties to gay spaces (even if they themselves aren't lesbian or gay). I love trans people whose dysphoria has put them at a place where they don't want to engage with any type of sexuality. I love trans people who are confused, unsure, or questioning. I love trans people who toe the lines of queerness. I love trans people who are unapologetically embracing their sexualities. I love trans people who are working through internalized shame about their sexualities.

[theposhperyton]

All evidence suggests yes

[scentofpines]

have you ever considered...that identifying out of woman/girlhood because you don't relate to the societal implications, expectations, etc... contributes to making womanhood (feel) even more restrictive? maybe you feel better when thinking of yourself as anything but a girl/woman because you do not feel like a woman (what does that even mean?) but in my opinion you just added another brick into the prisonwall that is gender.

[ren-054]

*baps and smacks around my gender and orientation labels like a little cat with their toy in great, fully engrossed enjoyment and enrichment*

[ghouldtime]

That anon ask about what Konig would do if his neighbor/love interest was jeopardized was so sad omg and it got me thinking.

What if they just confronted him on his distance? At that point in that scenario they have no idea he was even involved in the slightest. To them they just went through something so put of pocket and traumatic and the sweet guy they've assumedly fallen in love with has started packing his things, not talking to them so they go to him and ask if they are okay, if he's okay.

Que the tearful (but not over dramatic for the love of god) trauma dump about what happened to them and how they miss him and crafting nights. Would he come clean, so to speak? Would König still leave or would he try to work through it? Would he coldly reject them and tell them to just forget about him?

Oh hell, what if they piece it together?? Like you mentioned they saw his eyes beneath the mask and thought he sounded ever so slightly familiar, would they say anything?

Though i agree that it would be a massive reach for the whole thing to be able to happen in the first place, like you said unless there's a rat in KorTac or he some how slipped up, which tbh doubt it highly. You'd have better luck shooting a straw up the ass end of a gopher from 100 yards away. Homeboy probably doesn't even keep his gear and mask at his personal home, keeps it as far away from his civilian life as possible, I'd wager.

I'm going to break your hearts more - you don't even GET the chance to talk to him there.

Basically, your stuff is being already packed, you're being told to zip your mouth and not say anything to anyone. Your old identity is being erased, you're given a new one. They're not going to have that jeopardized because you wanted to talk to someone. You're just going to have to "Disappear". Which means new phone number, no contacting people from your old life (minus family if that's even applicable and they're feeling generous), and you're going far, far away.

As far as the world is concerned, you've fallen off the edge of it and disappeared. Giving you contact to ANYONE in your old life can jeopardize that. Trying to talk to ANYONE from your old life to reveal or ask anything - jeopardizing that. Refusing witness protection after THAT would be a really, really terrible idea and quite frankly, not worth it.

Not to mention, König wouldn't give them that chance either. You're not getting back and lounging around and having the luxury of time or goodbyes. The reality is, they're getting you out of there and you can't talk to anyone - they're already far in motion packing your things and shipping you off. König isn't going to make his appearance known, he isn't going to try and approach - you won't even see him. Your number and email are blocked, he's not letting you take that risk and possibly get another chance to be hurt because of him.

That's just the reality of going through something like that. You have to leave everyone and everything behind. You're not getting a chance to say goodbye or to confront him. That's it, what's done is done. Not his fault because that's just witness protection 101. I mean, he's not helping but he won't interfere, he knows how important it is and he wants you to have the best chance at life.

If they even tried to approach him during the initial rescue while they're still flying back to base after having been saved, he's not coming clean. He's not saying anything. He'll just deny and tell 'em to go away. It hurts, yes. But it would be even worse to have that confrontation and to put things together and have them confirmed.

"But doesn't he want to say goodbye?" Of course he does. But that only makes things harder. Like I said, he'd rather stick in your memories as the person you loved and lost due to circumstance than the person who did this to you.

What good would that do? He'd still have to leave you. You're not allowed to contact anyone and going back to him would literally just be putting you back in the ring of fire. He's not going to let that happen. That would feel even worse.

It hurts beyond anything else, but he's doing the right thing in his mind. A goodbye isn't worth tearing you up apart even more. You know in movies when someone has to let an animal go and ends up having to throw things at it and yell to get them to leave? Yeah. That's what's happening here.

There's not going to be a happy ending or scenario for this. There's not going to be closure. There's not going to be a chance with him.

Which is WHY he specifically put so many safety measures in place to ensure that this wouldn't happen. He doesn't want his work life encroaching on his domestic and he never wants to bring it back or expose you to it. Like I said, literally everything would have to go wrong. He's a careful man, he knows what the world can do. He's preparing specifically so that will not happen to the best of his ability. If he even thinks there's a compromise, he's acting. Better safe than sorry Also I love that gopher saying 😭

And you're correct! He doesn't keep his gear at home. The 'just in case' box which has some spare gear is locked up with a chain and all, shoved away in a back corner in the basement, and covered. He has 0 reason to have that stuff with him in civilian life. What's he going to do with it there? That's not to say he doesn't have weapons and guns hidden, but he doesn't have anything personal that would give his identity away. Everything work related stays at work, he's very serious on keeping them separated. If they needed to call him in, he'd have to go there anyways, so it makes sense to just... keep it there where it can be secure.

And just saying, I'm never writing that for the neighbor! Au because it's not happening. It's extremely improbable and I want to give him a happy ending 💚

[goozeghost]

I'm so genuinely out of it i can't figure out what's wrong with his face (faces aren't real to me rn 🤪) but that's ok bc i, a transman, am still here and still creating and i am going to continue doing so and there is nothing a certain group of idiots can do to stop me. 🫡😁👍

[hiemaldesirae]

The Hazbin Graduate’s Guide to Homicide (3)

HAZBIN'S MIDSEMESTER STUDENT REPORT Student: Vox Vanhal Supervising Staff: Professor Enoch Leviathan Sponsor: Not Applicable To the Board: Vox Vanhal may be one of the most brilliant students this school has seen in decades. In all my years of teaching at Hazbin, I have never met a student more insanely ready to learn and apply their skills- due in part, of course, to said student's own possible insanity. I mean this in a jovial way, of course, but I will admit that when young Vanhal's true identity was revealed to me that my first thought was along the lines of 'is this student insane?' Whether or not my student's reason should be called into question is something myself and my fellow professor Asmodeus have discussed in length, but there is one thing that we can definitively agree on: If there is any one student in this school who I would choose to place my bets on, it would be Vox Vanhal. There is nothing more to say at this time of report evaluation. Sincerely, Professor Leviathan.

May God's blessings be with you now and at the hour of our deaths, Amen.

[ 1 ] / [ 2 ] (<- read these first for context and more murder academy radiostatic content!)

Though Alastor may have thought that Vox was much more knowledgable in how Hazbin's Institution for Homicide worked, the truth was, Vox was still fully flying on the seat of his own coattails.

He had no damn clue what he was doing still, and although it'd been two weeks since he'd arrived, part of him still felt like how he did when he'd first arrived: hesitant, scared, not knowing where to go or what to do besides the want to make his boss suffer as he killed him.

That level of animosity might sound strange to anyone not a Hazbin student or alumnus, but it was perfectly normal for any student enrolled in the academy to have such feelings. After all, there was quite a rigorous process involved in the application, and for Vox, this application process (and what led to it) was perhaps more intense than most.

There had once been a time where Vox had dreamed of becoming a Hollywood starlet, one who lit up the silver screen and was blessed by hundreds of thousands of cheering, dedicated fans who would fawn over his every move and action. He'd wanted to follow in his mother's footsteps, at one point. But after taking on his first roles in Carmine Studios, the glamour of Hollywood had shattered like fine glass.

"Miss Vesper! Would you please look over here for a second?"

"Miss Vesper, when is your next movie coming out?!"

"Miss Vesper, is it true that you and your co-star on Anna Karenina, Valentino Vega had an affair-?"

"Fuck! Fuck, fuck, fuck! That- fucking bastard!" Vox rushed into the privacy of his and Val's shared apartment, slamming the door behind him as he collapsed into the couch, head cradled in his hands. He couldn't even begin to start detailing the number of ways he'd wanted to fucking butcher and rip apart his boss.

Andrealphus Goetia was no stranger to the spotlight, naturally. One of Hollywood's top directors, the man had been an influential cornerstone in the history of movie-making, a real legend to light the days. But behind that picturesque platinum reputation laid a monstrous piece of shit.

It had been a complete accident that Andrealphus had found out about Vox's identity.

Vox himself hadn't even really planned out what to do about himself at that point, only that he'd known that the dresses he wore on screen were far more suited to his best friend than they were for him. Knew that the copious amounts of makeup flattened on him everyday made him feel more like a clown than a princess, that it was the most uncomfortable feeling to have to sit and play the pretty face for the audience's sake.

But he persisted, telling himself, one more year, one more year til my savings account has enough to supply Val and I with a comfortable life and we can leave.

But of course- of course Andrealphus had to ruin it for him.

The man had found out and immediately proceeded to blackmailing Vox with the information, holding things such as promotions, media gossip and rumors over his head. And now... now... Vox stared down at the script he held clutched in his hand, his knuckles turning white as he grasped it with an iron grip.

"Dieser verdammte bastard," Vox muttered under his breath.

Though he'd never loved the spotlight that came with his first taste of fame, he had loved acting. Had loved being adored for his skill, applauded for the emotions that he could evoke in crowds of people and the way he could twist people's hearts. He had wanted to be one of the best, a household name.

And now, he stared down at the script for a movie that Andrealphus knew would tank his reputation. It was absolute bullshit. The plot was held together by thin strings and a bit of glue, despite being an adaptation of one of the past decade's best selling books. Not only that, but the moment he left the safety of the apartment once more, he would also have to contend with the rumors that were steadily piling against him and dragging his loved ones and friends into it too.

All this, because Vox had refused to sleep with his shitty boss.

He could still hear the fucker's voice- come on, don't you wanna say that you got a piece of me? I'll even leave out the part about you being a transvestite, darling, just the fact that I got a piece of you is enough.

God. If only.... if only he could see that bastard's face when he crushed his fucking skull in between his hands. He wanted to see Andrealphus' stupid face contort in revulsion and terror when Vox finally did the deed, wanted to bathe in the the fotze's inbred blood. He'd do anything for the chance to just kill that piece of shit-

"Amorcito?"

Val's voice makes Vox jump on the spot, quickly shifting to hide the script from view. His friend comes around the corner, eyebrows furrowed with concern, and it's this that makes Vox break his composure, a single tear falling down his face as Val frowns, taking a seat next to him on the couch. "Voxxy, amor... tell me what's wrong."

And because he can never keep his mouth shut when it comes to his best friend, Vox tells him everything. Val nods along, pauses at the right moments, all of that stuff that friends do when they're trying to let you know that they'd rip apart your shitty boss if not for the law.

But- and perhaps this is something that Vox knew deep down to be true anyway- Val was a bit different in that aspect. He'd met the man under... less than legal circumstances, after all, and he knew that Val was the heir to quite the illustrous cartel career.

So when Valentino stops him with a firm hand on the shoulder and hands him an application paper for Hazbin, telling him to think it through, Vox barely takes even a second glance at it before filling it out.

Now, two months later and sitting in the auditorium of Hazbin's famed Music Hall, Vox doesn't find himself regretting the decision. Sure, it's a bit lonely without Val's supporting presence by his side, but the students he's met so far have proved to be some of the friendliest people he's had the pleasure of knowing: ironic, considering the kind of school they're studying at. And he's even managed to make a friend! Not that bad a start, altogether.

Vox absentmindedly doodles on the edge of his notes as Professor Leviathan's soothing voice lectures them on the importance of a proper alibi. "If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, looks like a duck, but it has an airtight alibi, it is...?"

"Not a duck," the auditorium echoes back to the professor, who nods, looking satisfied with the class's response. "So, then! The first step to alibi making is...? Miss Velvette, perhaps you'd like to answer this one for us?"

The girl sitting beside Vox shoots up in her seat, looking as if she'd just fallen asleep and was awoken by the professor's question. "Uh... the..."

After a moment of silence and stuttering, Vox takes pity on the girl, sliding Velvette over a slide of paper that she squints at before reading. "Make sure you're in a different place from the crime?"

"And how would I do that?"

"I... uh. Use an accomplice...?" Velvette stutters.

Professor Leviathan shakes his head, looking disappointed. "Not quite. One thing you will have to learn at Hazbin's is that you should never rely on any other person to carry your deed out for you. No hiring accomplices- after all, paid personnel's loyalty is shaky and they have no honor code preventing them from taking you to the police- and absolutely no committing crimes as lovers, unless you can guarantee that neither of you will be snitching. Would anyone else like to take a try?"

Vox raises his hand hesitantly. "Move the crime scene or otherwise obscure the culprit?"

Professor Leviathan snaps his fingers, "Yes! Absolutely. One of the best ways to make yourself an iron clad alibi is, if the pope is shot in the church at midnight, make sure that you are seen halfway across town in the bar at midnight; so drunk that you cannot even leave until your wife comes to pick you up at two- and no one will suspect you, even if he was actually killed right outside the pub and moved to the church instead. By moving the crime scene, you can make yourself an ironclad alibi. Obscuring the identity of the perpetrator and making it someone who couldn't possibly be you also works splendidly. After all, if the police believe the murderer to be a six foot tall adult man, then the actual perpetrator, a four foot tall young woman, would be able to pass by completely unnoticed. Thank you for that input, Vox. Now, onto the actual creation of such an alibi..."

When class ends, Vox is the first to leave his seat and head for the door, intending on leaving and getting to Track with Professor Satan as quick as possible when someone stops him in his tracks with a firm grip on his shoulder.

"Hey. Vox Vanhal, right?"

"That would be me, yes," Vox turns to face the person he's talking to, only to be met with the young woman that Professor Leviathan had called out in class earlier. "You were... Velvette?"

"Yep, that's me," the chipper young woman responds. "Listen, I know you don't know me at all, but I really need to get through this school year. Like- look, okay, I'm in a little bit over my head right now. I still want to go here and do what everyone here does, of course, I'd love to just go and plunge a damn butcher's knife into my cunt of an ex-friend's neck, but... well, you saw how I did back in class- look, what I'm trying to get at is I need someone to help me. And you're like, Leviathan's star student. So- I don't care what I have to do, I'll-"

Vox holds up a hand to stop her.

"I don't need you to do anything for me, unless you've got any tips on how to kill my boss and make him suffer during it. But I'll help you with whatever you need to study during your courses. Just..." He pauses, taking a moment to think out what he's about to ask. "Could you teach me how you did your makeup on your own?"

Velvette blinks, clearly not expecting that response. She laughs, a shrill, sharp bark and grabs his hand to shake it firmly. "Yeah, 'course I can. So, do we have a deal?"

"We do," Vox smiles. "Pleased to make your acquaintance."

[sickly-sapphic]

shaking ppls shoulders to make them realise a lot of complicated identities are important to the intersex community and that yes, some "afab" people with be transfeminine and some "amab" people will be transmasuline, and yes turigirls and lesboys will always identify that way for specifically intersex reasons and that you can't... deny people that right

[wildwren]

Danny and Paul Cho // Beef (2023)

screaming, crying, chewing the drywall etc.

[dreemurr-skelememer]

do you think stargaze poly is more transfem or transmasc aligned

in my opinion they're mostly transmasc but i can totally see them all being transfem aligned LMFAO

[lapdogchase]

i think theres a lot to be said about how marginalized men are oppressed based on both their marginalized identity alone as well as how their manhood and masculinity (or lack of masculinity) interact w it, & there's something to be said for how harmful radical-feminist hating men can be & how harmful anti-masculiity can be, and absolutely none of it is being said by using the word "misandry" and implying men are marginalized systemically based on their manhood alone